


kiss the girl (boy)

by lumenera



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bokuto really loves Disney, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, M/M, Matchmaking, Third Gym (Haikyuu!!), training camp antics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:27:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24866818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumenera/pseuds/lumenera
Summary: there, you see him, sittin' there across the way...he don't got a lot to say, but there's something about himBokuto decides that Akaashi and Kenma need a little push, in the form of a Disney song.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Kozume Kenma, Bokuto Koutarou & Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	kiss the girl (boy)

**Author's Note:**

> **dedicated to:** [@notfroyoon](https://tmblr.co/mm9CINIYoFSH5zCof21qLgA), who is very rad and demanded(in a good way) that I actually flesh this out into a fic instead of letting it sit as an idea <3
> 
> Here’s the [Japanese version](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DBfdT-zcVehI&t=YWM4ZDZlOTcwNzJjMDhkNGQyMjk2MjY5NDNiMzI4NzU3ZGMxMTJhNSx0SDBiRG1nYw%3D%3D&b=t%3ABzy9F1-Scvh2cjWEgsAf8w&p=https%3A%2F%2Flumenera.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F620606670921465856%2Fkiss-the-girl-boy-pairing-akaashi-keijikozume&m=1) of Kiss the Girl, and here’s the [English version](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DTrRbB-qUJfY&t=NGRmMWQ5ODFiMDgxYzg3YWM2Yzc3NjhkZDYwNGE3ZTc1OGVlZjcyZSx0SDBiRG1nYw%3D%3D&b=t%3ABzy9F1-Scvh2cjWEgsAf8w&p=https%3A%2F%2Flumenera.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F620606670921465856%2Fkiss-the-girl-boy-pairing-akaashi-keijikozume&m=1), though in the fic I reference the English one

“What are we watching tonight?” Kuroo asked as Bokuto searched through his movie collection. The second Friday of the month always meant their movie night, and this time, it was Bokuto’s turn to choose.

“Aha!” Bokuto triumphantly waved a DVD in the air.

Kuroo squinted as he tried to make out the words. “The Little Mermaid?”

“Yeah, it’s a classic.” Bokuto popped open the DVD player, then turned on the TV. “Kuroo, can you pass me the popcorn?”

“Sure.” He set the bowl on the table, and Bokuto took a handful, munching on it as he messed with the TV settings. Once he got everything set up, Bokuto leaned back on the couch.

“Oi, give me some of the blanket.”

“Don’t you have your own?”

“You took both of them, stop acting innocent. I’m withholding the popcorn until you give mine back.” He hugged the popcorn bowl protectively to his chest.

“Fine.” Kuroo separated the two blankets in exchange for access to the popcorn. Bokuto hit play.

As customary to every Disney movie they’d watched together, Bokuto sang with the soundtrack. If he wasn’t singing, then he was humming along. He did the solo on Part of Your World and hit every note on Poor Unfortunate Souls. But when it came to the lagoon scene, Bokuto clapped his hands together, leaning forward. “This is my favorite part.”

“Sha la la la my, oh, my, looks like the boy too shy, ain’t gonna, kiss the girl.” The crab waved his claws, conducting his makeshift orchestra.

“Reminds me of two setters we know.” Kuroo said with a smirk.

“Two setters? Who?” Bokuto tore his gaze away from the screen, momentarily distracted. “The only two setters we know are Akaashi and Kenma.”

“Yes, those setters, Bokuto.”

“They like each other?” Bokuto trained his eyes on Kuroo, the movie forgotten.

“The entire training camp knows about it.” Kuroo waved his hands in the air, exasperated. “The coaches know about it. Neither of them will talk to each other about it, though. ‘Just taking their time’, or something like that.”

“No one told me?”

“Sorry, I think they assumed you knew. You spend the most time with Akaashi, after all.”

“We don’t talk about stuff like that.” Bokuto frowned, then perked up as he came up with an idea. “We should help get them together!”

“Wait, what?”

“You said this song reminded you of them, right?”

“Well, yes, but–”

“Then we’ll play this song for them, but they’ll actually kiss!”

“Bo–”

“Akaashi should be happy,” Bokuto declared solemnly. “He and Kenma should go for it.” He started singing, swaying side to side. “ _There, you see him, sitting there across the way…_ ”

“Bokuto. Bo.”

“Hmm?”

“That’s English. We live in Japan. We speak _Japanese_.”

"Akaashi knows English! We’ll be fine!” Bokuto waved off all his concerns.

“Bo, no.”

“Bo, yes.” Bokuto grinned wickedly at him.

Kuoo’s only coherent thought was, _Kenma is going to kill me_. Well, if he was going to get murdered in his sleep by an angry best friend, he might as well have a little fun along the way.

***

However, their next training camp came with the inclusion of Karasuno. Hinata kept hanging around Kenma during breaks, so Akaashi hung back from a distance.

“Huh, they’re not spending as much time together,” Bokuto commented.

“It’s because of Hinata,” Kuroo pointed out. “He and Kenma struck up a friendship at our first practice game together.”

Bokuto frowned. “That’s going to be a problem.”

“What?” Kuroo asked, but Bokuto was already walking away.

“I have to make adjustments!” Bokuto called over his shoulder.

Kuroo eyed him warily, then shrugged. He had better things to be worried about.

He was walking back from the baths when suddenly, someone pulled him into an empty classroom. He glanced around wildly. “Who’s there?”

“Shh,” Bokuto hissed, a finger to his lips. “Wait.”

They peeked their heads out again, and moments later, Konoha exited, towel slung over his shoulders. Bokuto pulled him into the classroom as well. Konoha screamed and dropped his towel.

“Shh!” Bokuto hissed again. “It’s me, Bokuto.”

“What’s going on?” Konoha asked, looking around, confused.

“Sit,” Bokuto ordered. Kuroo and Konoha exchanged glances with each other, but dutifully sat on the ground. Bokuto produced a paper copy of his plan, handing one stapled mass to each of them.

“I thought you were joking,” Kuroo said in disbelief. He didn’t think Bokuto was actually going to go through with it. “We were talking about it, but I didn’t think you meant this training camp.”

“What’s this?” Konoha asked, flipping through the pages. Kuroo felt bad for him. He had no idea what was going on.

“I call it, Project: Get Akaashi and Kenma Together.” Bokuto tapped the blackboard. Sometime, between practice games and now, he’d managed to draw out a full diagram of the Shinzen fields. The entire thing was poorly drawn, with stick figures and messy kanji. Kuroo could barely make out the words _door_ and _grass_. He blinked, trying to see if he was imagining it. He wasn’t.

“Oh, Megane-kun! There you are.” Bokuto spotted someone and waved him into the classroom.

“It’s Tsukishima. Tsu-ki-shi-ma.” The boy enunciated each syllable for him.

“Nevermind that, just get in here.”

“Why does he get to walk in instead of being dragged?” Konoha asked Kuroo. Kuroo shook his head in a way that clearly said, _don’t ask me_.

Tsukishima sighed and entered the classroom. “What do you want?”

“Sit.” Bokuto snapped his finger and pointed. Tsukishima scowled, but he sat down. He handed the boy a stack of loose leaf paper. “This is Project Get Akaashi and Kenma together.”

“Why do you want me here, then? I’m leaving.” Tsukishima started to stand, but Bokuto pushed him back down.

“Megane-kun, you have to distract Hinata.”

“What.” Tsukishima balked, but at least he wasn’t fighting the older boy in an attempt to leave anymore.

“So,” Bokuto clapped his hands together. “Hinata and Kenma spend a lot of time together, don’t they? So Akaashi and Kenma have been spending less time together than usual. Tsukishima,” he pointed at the boy, “Once you distract Hinata, Konoha and I send Akaashi to sit with Kenma. The speaker will already be put in place here, right behind where they usually sit.”

Bokuto gestured to the blackboard to illustrate his point. “And all I have to do is hit play.”

“What am I doing?” asked Kuroo.

“You’re directing, of course. We’ll run through the acts on your word. This plan is foolproof.”

The three of them shot glances at each other, but none of them said a word.

“Everyone understand? If not, that’s why I made you printed copies! Sorry, Tsukishima, yours is handwritten because I only made your adjustment today.”

“Do I have to?”

“Yes.” Bokuto declared. “You don’t have a choice.”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes at him, but he didn’t say no.

***

The next day, they set their plan into motion. As soon as they took their midday break, Bokuto locked eyes with Kuroo. Kuroo nodded, and Bokuto turned to Konoha, who ran off to get the speaker. Kuroo kept one eye on the field as he picked up his lunch. Kenma sat with Hinata at the edge of the field, like always. He saw Konoha slip behind the pair and set something down before giving a thumbs up. The speaker was in place.

Kuroo looked at Tsukishima, who sighed and went to distract Hinata. He motioned for his teammate to come over, and Hinata stood. They headed off to where the rest of their team was at, and Konoha and Akaashi appeared from the side. Konoha said something to Akaashi, then pushed him towards Kenma. Somehow, everything was working perfectly. He turned towards the final piece of the plan.

Bokuto couldn’t contain his excitement, and he started to bounce on the tips of his toes, dropping his phone on the ground. Kuroo sighed and put his face in his hands. They’d come this far, and Bokuto got so worked up he forgot he had a job to do. He waved his arms frantically at him, trying to get his attention without shouting. If Akaashi or Kenma heard him now, it would all be over.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hinata move away from Tsukishima, back towards Kenma. _No, no, no, no, no_. Of course, once he said that everything was going perfectly, something had to go wrong. He waved his arms faster. When Bokuto still didn’t register that Kuroo was trying to call him, he gave up and started inching his way toward him. If he tried to run, he’d catch unwanted attention.

Wait. Where was Hinata? He scanned his surroundings and found the boy, kicking his legs as he fought a pair of pale, skinny arms surrounding his torso. Even from halfway across the field, he could see the murder in Tsukishima’s eyes.

“There, you see her….” Kuroo took a step back as the song rippled across the field. He whipped his head back around and found Konoha standing next to Bokuto, phone in hand. He breathed a sigh of relief. “Sitting there across the way…She don’t got a lot to say, but there’s something about her…And you don’t know why, but you’re dying to try, you wanna, kiss the girl.”

Konoha and Tsukishima to the rescue. Kuroo was pretty sure in that moment, he’d lost a few years off his life. He surveyed the rest of the people on the field. Both Bokuto and Konoha had their hands cupped over their mouths, singing along, words clearly directed at the two setters. Well, at least some people were enjoying themselves.

The rest of the teams searched for the sound, eyes eventually coming to rest on Akaashi and Kenma. The speaker had been placed right behind them. The entire Karasuno team looked confused, except Tsukishima, who was still trying to commit Kuroo’s murder. The Fukurodani and Nekoma teams watched the unfolding scene with interest. Shinzen and Ubegawa looked less concerned, but watched all the same. Kuroo was pretty sure he heard some others singing along, everyone waiting to see what they would do next.

“Yes, you want her…look at her you know you do. It’s possible she wants you too, there’s one way to ask her…It don’t take a word, not a single word go on and kiss the girl.”

Yep, Kenma was definitely staring daggers at him. He hated all the attention that was coming his way. Kuroo did his best to smile at him, hoping he could see it across the field. If it was any other time, he probably would have made a joke about how popular he was, with two people trying to kill him, but he had no one to tell it to, and the likelihood of actually being murdered by one of them was far too high for his liking.

Akaashi glanced at Konoha and Bokuto, then at Kenma, then back at Konoha and Bokuto.

“Sha la la la la la, my oh my, looks like the boy too shy, ain’t gonna kiss the girl. Sha la la la la la, ain’t that sad, ain’t that a shame, too bad, he gonna miss the girl.”

Bokuto went all out for the last line, belting it at the top of his lungs. “Go on and kiss the girl!!”

The two of them locked eyes with each other, the first time since the song started. Akaashi reached up to brush Kenma’s hair away from his face, then leaned forward and kissed him. The whole camp cheered.

Kuroo walked over to where Bokuto and Konoha stood. Bokuto held his hands out for a double high five, and Konoha and Kuroo obliged. “Congrats, guys, we did it! Project Get Akaashi and Kenma Together worked.”

Kuroo put his head in his hands. “You forgot to hit play, Bokuto.”

“It’s fine! Konoha made it happen.” Bokuto aimed finger guns at Konoha, who gave him a weird look, taking a step backwards. Tsukishima joined them with a thunderous scowl on his face.

“I’m never doing that again. You cannot force me to physically restrain Hinata again. I never want to be in an extended period of time where I have to interact with Hinata again.”

“You did great, Megane-kun.”

“Tsukishima. I know you know my name, you said it yesterday.”

“Megane-kun.” Bokuto winked.

“I’m never blocking for you again.”

“Such rude kouhai. What do they teach you in Miyagi?”

Kuroo shook his head. At least they’d gotten Akaashi and Kenma to take a step forward.

**Author's Note:**

> Tsukishima is so tired please just let him rest Bokuto
> 
> It would make me super happy if you left a comment or kudos if you liked it <3  
> Hope you guys are having a good day
> 
> [my tumblr](https://lumenera.tumblr.com/)


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